Episode Data

The Brittas Empire

update

Season 0

• _{not specified}

  6: Harriet's Webisode

  Harriet Thorpe recorded a short Brittas episode at the reunion. Cast includes: Chris Barrie, Russell Porter-Deathridge, Pippa Haywood and Judy Flynn; together for the first time in 20 years

• _{not specified}

  7: Series 4 Out Takes

  Series 4 Out Takes

• _{not specified}

  3: Good Morning Interview

  Interview/behind the scenes section for Good Morning Britain

• _{not specified}

  4: Wogan Interview

  Chris Barrie being interviewed on Wogan on BBC 1 about Brittas

• _{not specified}

  5: Season 4 Outtakes

  An 8 minute collection of outtakes/bloopers from Season 4

• _{Friday, October 11th, 1996}

  1: Royal Variety Performance

  Brittas reveals himself as an enthusiast for conformity with EEC regulations.

• _{Tuesday, December 24th, 1996}

  2: Surviving Christmas

  It's Christmas time and Gordon has decided, rather than to keep the centre open in the weeks surrounding Christmas, to take the staff on a survival course in Wales. Closing the centre for Christmas angers the usual 'Father Christmas' character, who is told he is out of a job this year. Meanwhile, Colin decides to give out Christmas cards early. Due to a mix-up involving the recycled paper the cards are made of, Helen assumes that Gordon is having an affair with Carole the receptionist. To prevent Gordon from getting close to Carole, Helen decides to join the staff on the survival course. During a constantly interrupted survival briefing, a rock is thrown through the window with the note 'You're going to die' tied to it. Gordon assumes this is all part of the course and continues as normal, but the rest of the group remain shaken and scared. When a survival exercise involving camping in the mountains begins, the group are faced with many life-threatening hazards, all the while Gordon calm with the thought that it is all part of the course.

Season 1

• _{Thursday, January 3rd, 1991}

  1: Laying the Foundations

  Gordon Brittas is the manager at Whitbury Leisure Centre. The builders are laying the foundations but Gordon is very rude to one of the workers and they go on strike. He causes more trouble when he upsets one of the staff members and he's in for it when he is having a meeting with the staff.

• _{Thursday, January 10th, 1991}

  2: Opening Day

  I'ts Opening Day at Whitbury Leisure Centre and Gordon is getting ready to meet the Duchess of Kent. But things are going wrong when the electric doors aren't working properly and the water from the swimming pool is disappearing and the temperature rises. Will Gordon sort it all out before the Duchess of Kent arrives?

• _{Thursday, January 24th, 1991}

  3: Bye Bye Baby

  Carole has heard that her husband Derek is coming back, after what happened a long time ago. After all these years she will not have to work, Ben will have a father and she will feel much better. Meanwhile her baby goes missing and reception is getting crowded. Gordon tries to help tells Colin to find the baby and return it. Unfortunately Colin ends up returning the wrong baby. Then Gordon sorts out a man who has escaped a lot of stress. Will everything go right?

• _{Thursday, January 31st, 1991}

  4: Underwater Wedding

  While doing an interview with Beverly, Gordon realizes that the best man for the underwater wedding that is happening in the pool is in trouble. Gavin is asked to help and then a disabled man in an electric wheel chair ends up getting drunk and starts causing trouble. Gordon is ready to stop the drunk but his ends up sending Gavin to hospital. Will Gordon stop the drunk?

• _{Thursday, February 7th, 1991}

  5: Stop Thief

  Things have gone missing and Gordon has closed the centre for the day. He explains that there could be a thief about and sets a trap to catch the thief. The plan is to hide in a locker and sees who takes the bait (his wallet). Meanwhile Helen is suffering more stress then ever and takes Gordon to see the doctor leaving Colin to hide in the locker. That afternoon it turns out there isn't a thief but Colin is left hanging on the rail still in the locker.

• _{Thursday, February 14th, 1991}

  6: Assassin

  Gordon is dealing with two problems today. He has heard that the centre is getting low on visitors and that someone is trying to kill him. All over the centre the killer is still trying to kill Gordon, but each time it goes wrong. Then the most dangerous attempt is going to be made. Who is the killer and what will happen to Gordon?

Season 2

• _{Thursday, January 2nd, 1992}

  1: Back from the Dead

  Gordon is away at a conference in Bulgaria. Meanwhile the Leisure Centre is low on visitors, then news spreads that Gordon is dead. Everyone is happy and the centre is pouring with visitors. All goes well until Gordon comes back, which gives everyone a shock - especially Carole, who thinks that Gordon is back from the dead.

• _{Thursday, January 9th, 1992}

  2: Temple of the Body

  Brittas is horrified to discover women's underwear in his office, and is convinced that a staff member is using the facilities to have sex. He segregates the sexes and bugs Linda; the evidence gathered leads him to Gavin. The real culprit is in fact Helen, who discovers Gordon unknowingly had sex with Carol at a fancy dress party. Simultaneously, Julie is being hounded by reporters for rescuing a dog from a river in the nude..

• _{Thursday, January 16th, 1992}

  3: An Inspector Calls

  Brittas fears for his job when the Southern Area Inspector visits, fully aware that visiting figures are poor. Colin accidentally causes a pigeon to roost in the gymnasium, leading to a chain of chaotic trivialities threatening the inspection. Helen meanwhile has been insulted by a badly chosen birthday present, a moped with a yellow helmet reading "Hi I'm Helen", thus she decides to leave Gordon.

• _{Thursday, January 23rd, 1992}

  4: Set In Concrete

  An extreme argument with the Rotary Club has caused Brittas's feet to be set in concrete, who after frequent fights breaking out, considers if the centre has Sick Building Syndrome; a Specialist arrives. However Laura tries to explain to Brittas that it is he who is the cause of the centre's problems.

• _{Thursday, January 30th, 1992}

  5: Mums and Dads

  The centre is preparing for a concert by Vladimir Petrov, a visiting pianist from the Leningrad Conservatory. Brittas’s father arrives with an old piano, which after being dropped knocks the pianist unconscious. As a result, Gordon decides to perform the concert himself.

• _{Thursday, February 13th, 1992}

  6: Safety First

  Gordon is practicing a fire drill, which he over-complicates in his inimitable style. Meanwhile, Helen is planning a picnic in Gordon's office, to which she'd like him to come. Much to her frustration though, Gordon seems to be very busy. Mrs Dapping arrives, and Gordon tells her about the faulty fire exit. She takes no notice until a fire erupts from the Lost Property cupboard, which causes disaster.

• _{Thursday, February 20th, 1992}

  7: New Generations

  A pregnant cow, loose in the centre, accidentally eats some of Colin's "herbs", sending it into labour on the squash courts. Carole has also eaten the leaves, and her babies end up being delivered by the vet who had originally come to assist the cow.

Season 3

• _{Thursday, January 7th, 1993}

  1: The Trial

  The staff of Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre have sent Gordon to Coventry because Gordon is on trial for murdering strange people. The prosecutor explains that there is someone in the Centre who doesn't like Gordon and will stick glue to anything he touches. Two cases of money have been found in a locker and locker keys end up behind the toilets. When Gordon switches on the chainsaw he is sure to be guilty not until Eddie comes to the rescue.

• _{Thursday, January 14th, 1993}

  2: That Creeping Feeling

  After the trial the Staff are ignoring Gordon and Laura explains why. Gordon decides to arrange an appointment with a phychologist. Meanwhile he also gets a parcel from and old rival which is strange because all there is is leaves and even Gavin discovers a half eaten spider. Linda goes to find out why and then she comes up with the answer. It gets worse when Colin gets bitten by a poisonous spider.

• _{Thursday, January 21st, 1993}

  3: Laura's Leaving

  Laura is going for a job interview and Helen is worried that she might be offered the job and leave the leisure centre. Gordon is busy preparing for the local Church to hold a baptism session in the pool, which Colin manages to disrupt by electrocuting the congregation. In a move which greatly angers the staff, Gordon dismisses Carole. Then, Laura surprises everyone with some news.

• _{Thursday, January 28th, 1993}

  4: Two Little Boys

  It's Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre's Birthday today and Gordon has done some birthday specials for the centre although some of them have gone wrong. Meanwhile the oil which has been delivered 3 weeks ago has disappeared. It turns out that there's a hole in the tank, Gordon tells Colin to put the oil somewhere safe which turns out to be a very small cupboard. A group from another leisure centre to do the activities so they can have some fun. Horatio talks to Gordon that he doesn't want to go to his new job, Gordon however tells him that it's important until a nasty explosion causes everyone to be injured.

• _{Thursday, February 4th, 1993}

  5: Sex, Lies and Red Tape

  Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre are trying to raise money so they can buy a new trampoline. Gavin and Tim are doing a sponsered sponge throw and Gordon is doing a sponsered silence. It's also Laura's birthday and her husband Michael has come from America to see her. He ruins Gordon's sponsered silence and spoils the charity. Helen is acting suspiciously because she is being accused of shoplifting which is in fact true. Gordon tries to sort everthing out and completely upsets himself when Michael turns out to be Laura's Husband.

• _{Thursday, February 11th, 1993}

  6: The Stuff of Dreams

  Gordon spends the day by pretending to be an old man Mr Derek Didcot. Laura discovers him straight away and Gordon tells her that what will happen when he gets old and has to retire and all about the dream he had last night. Colin is taken by surprise when he discovers that Mr Didcot is accually Gordon. Gordon has an interview with Linda and then the time has come when Helen goes into labour. Gordon has trouble getting to the hospital and then gets stuck in traffic. What will happen to Helen and her babies?

Season 4

• _{Monday, January 10th, 1994}

  1: Not a Good Day ...

  It's Life Cycle week at the Centre, and Sebastian Coe has come to help promote the event. Unfortunately, confusion involving a troublesome child leads to Colin mistakenly chaining Coe to a railing and the centre being attacked by a Roman recreational society. Carole’s son Ben escapes from his cupboard.

• _{Monday, January 17th, 1994}

  2: The Christening

  On the day of the Brittas twins' christening, Helen has misplaced them somewhere in town. Their vicar, uncle Horatio arrives with an unpleasant fiancée who enjoys speaking her mind, and neither Helen nor Brittas get along with her.

• _{Monday, January 24th, 1994}

  3: Biggles Tells a Lie

  To impress his daughter Stephanie while visiting from Australia, Colin pretends to be manager of the Centre. Whilst Brittas takes the day off, the staff - previously unaware of her existence, help Colin to keep up the pretence that he is what he claims to be.

• _{Monday, January 31st, 1994}

  4: Mr Brittas Changes Trains

  Brittas is to attend an important dinner meeting, but Helen, knowing it will be a disaster that she too will need to attend, develops lockjaw. After a staff visit to a hypnosis show, certain staff members start to exhibit erratic behaviour. When the hypnotist arrives to solve the problem, Brittas is accidentally hypnotised, making him a much better person - until its effects wear off at midnight.

• _{Monday, February 7th, 1994}

  5: Playing with Fire

  Helen and the children have gone on holiday, leaving Brittas home alone. Gavin's former girlfriend Jennifer returns, intent on reconciling, which causes a rift in his relationship with Tim, but then they discover that Jen has escaped from a mental institution with a case of explosives. Meanwhile, participating in Energy Saving Week, Colin has created a generator powered by the centre's 'waste material'; Jen attaches Brittas to the generator and he is electrocuted.

• _{Monday, February 14th, 1994}

  6: Shall We Dance?

  Helen is still away, and as Brittas and Laura grow closer, the staff spread rumours that they are having an affair; even more so when he announces he will be taking Laura to the annual staff dance. Her ex-husband Michael visits, intent on reuniting with her. Carole has invited her first boyfriend to the dance, who is intent on proposing marriage.

• _{Monday, February 28th, 1994}

  7: The Chop

  Councillor Druggett arrives in another attempt to sack Brittas as manager of the centre. £300 is missing from petty cash, which Helen borrowed to buy a dog. Druggett gives Brittas an ultimatum: either he accepts responsibility for mismanaging the hotel and resigns, or his wife will be prosecuted. Mindful of previous convictions and, fearing being imprisoned, Helen hides in the dog kennel. Gordon replaces the money, claiming he had taken it, and resigns.

• _{Monday, March 7th, 1994}

  8: High Noon

  With a replacement manager, the centre is busier than ever. But the new manager is untidy, disorganised, and apathetic, much to Brittas' disappointment. However, even as a visitor to the centre, Brittas still manages to cause chaos: an accident involving a gas leak and a faulty clock causes an explosion and fire. After the centre is destroyed, Brittas is regarded as a hero, decorated, and offered his old job back.

Season 5

• _{Monday, October 31st, 1994}

  1: The Old, Old Story

  Following the destruction of the Leisure Centre by a large fire, Gordon is now back as Manager. 'Songs of Praise' is due to be held at the Centre; Gordon is very excited at this prospect, and he and Helen are going for an interview with the show's presenter. Trouble brews as the team begin to suspect that a serial killer may be on the loose. Nevertheless, Gordon is determined that the recording of 'Songs of Praise' must go on. But then he ends up face-to-face with the suspected serial killer, which turns out to be an ostrich.

• _{Monday, November 7th, 1994}

  2: Blind Devotion

  Gordon Brittas is thinking of going to Brussels for European Commissioner. Colin gets blinded when his garden explodes and starts causing trouble when he can't see where he is going. Gordon is thinking of giving Colin the sack because of his ways. Then he kills Colin's pet bird and tells Tim to get another one. It turns out that it's also Colin's birthday and that the saddest thing is that his aunt died. Gordon decides not to give Colin the sack and promotes him to deputy manager.

• _{Monday, November 14th, 1994}

  3: Brussels Calling

  Gordon Brittas is in Brussels being interviewed for European Commissioner of Sport. He keeps calling Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre to see how things are going. Laura is in charge and things aren't going well. A children's birthday party goes wrong and Tim is very upset. Then a load of mice turn up and Gordon tells Gavin on the telephone that he must throw the ingredients away. Meanwhile Helen is being accussed of attacking Mr Furber, one of her child's school teachers. Will things turn out well at the centre?

• _{Monday, November 21st, 1994}

  4: The Lies Have It

  Gordon Brittas is explaining about safety at the building site where a new room is being made. Michael T. Farrell comes to Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre for a job which is advertised in the newspaper. Gordon is not at all pleased but gives Michael an application form for the job. Carole is upset because no one remembered her birthday, Michael starts to make lies about her party and everyone agrees but Colin tells the truth from his point of view. Gordon is confused and soon realises what's been going on.

• _{Monday, November 28th, 1994}

  5: The Boss

  Gordon Brittas explains that Gavin will be taking over as trial manager for one day. Gavin is really excited and soon starts enjoying it. But then he is told about emergency situations like pregnences, marooned school buses and poisonous gas leaks. Gordon is testing out his abilities and Tim is not to pleased. Being tired and worried Gordon takes over when things start to go wrong. Meanwhile Carole is going out for the day but is shocked to discover that her friend is dead.

• _{Monday, December 5th, 1994}

  6: Pregnant

  Gordon Brittas is doing Urine tests on his staff. He thinks that the women in the centre are pregnant. Everyone is shocked and surprised especially Carole when she can't believe what she has heard. Gordon tells her that she may have to marry Colin if he's the father of Carole's child. Then disaster strikes when Gordon tells Tim that he might be pregnant. Tim is shocked and denies that he isn't a women. Gavin rescues Tim and punches Gordon in the nose. Meanwhile Julie is feeling very happy when she finds someone that she loves, but then she gets the blame when it turns out the urine samples were dropped and disarranged.

• _{Monday, December 12th, 1994}

  7: UXB

  Colin discovers an unexploded missile in the basement and tries to warn Gordon but he takes no notice and tells him to sort out his problems on his own. While doing this on his own Gordon is packing his things away for his departure for Brussels. Then Colin gets hit on the head by a croquet ball by Gavin and Tim and Colin ends up being rushed to hospital. Then no one knows but Colin had put the missile in the racket box and tries to warn everyone but everyone is having a party for their new futures.

• _{Monday, December 19th, 1994}

  8: The Last Day

  Gordon is ready to leave for Brussels but Helen isn't to keen on going. Then she sees Gordon's pictures and the hotel and decides to go with him. Gordon offers his Management to Laura but she is going to America for he baby to be raised. Everyone is excited but Gordon then says that due to an unreplied message he won't be going. An emergency water tank is installed and then makes the ceiling collapse. Carole is on trouble when she gets stuck in her toy car. Then Gordon pushes Carole but is too late to get himself clear. This then means the end for Gordon Brittas.

• _{Tuesday, December 27th, 1994}

  9: In the Beginning ...

  It's Christmas time and everyone is coming to Colin's Scottish Castle to celebrate the man who gave them everything at Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre. Laura tells the story about one Christmas holiday that went wrong. Things weren't going well and the staff were trapped in the centre and weren't allowed out until the snow had cleared.

Season 6

• _{Monday, January 22nd, 1996}

  8: Surviving Christmas

  It's Christmas time and Gordon has decided, rather than to keep the centre open in the weeks surrounding Christmas, to take the staff on a survival course in Wales. Closing the centre for Christmas angers the usual 'Father Christmas' character, who is told he is out of a job this year. Meanwhile, Colin decides to give out Christmas cards early. Due to a mix-up involving the recycled paper the cards are made of, Helen assumes that Gordon is having an affair with Carole the receptionist. To prevent Gordon from getting close to Carole, Helen decides to join the staff on the survival course. During a constantly interrupted survival briefing, a rock is thrown through the window with the note 'You're going to die' tied to it. Gordon assumes this is all part of the course and continues as normal, but the rest of the group remain shaken and scared. When a survival exercise involving camping in the mountains begins, the group are faced with many life-threatening hazards, all the while Gordon calm with the thought that it is all part of the course.

• _{Tuesday, February 27th, 1996}

  1: Back with a Bang

  After being crushed to death Gordon Brittas has been returned to earth by St. Peter and rebuilt at a Swiss clinic. He returns a day early and misses the red carpet welcome prepared by his staff.

• _{Tuesday, March 12th, 1996}

  2: Body Language

  Gordon tries to explain benefits of matching and mirroring body language. Colin suspects alien invasion when a green block of ice crashes through the roof, and Helen mistakenly sells the house to a member of the U.S. military.

• _{Tuesday, March 26th, 1996}

  3: At the Double

  Gordon invites members of the Ruthenian State Circus to perform at the centre. A group of US evangelists want to baptise Gordon in the pool after reading of his coming back from the dead.

• _{Tuesday, April 2nd, 1996}

  4: A Walk on the Wild Side

  Brittas proves he's not always a walking disaster when his new campaign becomes a European Directive.

• _{Tuesday, April 9th, 1996}

  5: We All Fall Down

  Whitbury is celebrating World Peace and Hunger Day, Helen plans revenge on a nappy company that didn't use her children in a TV commercial and Tim discovers the rest of the staff earn more than him.

• _{Tuesday, April 16th, 1996}

  6: Mr. Brittas Falls in Love

  Brittas organises a "dolphin day" at the centre, but as always disaster reigns when a baby tiger shark is delivered to the sports centre instead. The day worsens when a teenage girl arrives for two weeks of work experience and the staff believe she has been eaten. Meanwhile, Linda forms a protest rally outside of the centre, opposed to the use of animals for personal amusement.

• _{Tuesday, April 23rd, 1996}

  7: Snap Happy

  The staff prepare for a photograph, however a chain of trivialities delays the event. Meanwhile, apart from Gordon Brittas, Helen also hates heights, so she participates in a parachute jump which goes horribly wrong.

Season 7

• _{Tuesday, December 24th, 1996}

  0: Surviving Christmas

  Gordon takes the staff for a military-style team-building exercise into Wales. While dealing with the rigors of the wild, they are relentlessly pursued by would-be assassins. Gordon's well-intentioned motivational skills make things worse.

• _{Monday, January 6th, 1997}

  1: The Elephants' Child

  Brittas organizes a sponsored bungee jump and expects his staff to take part. Helen Brittas plans a burglary to fund her bid for the franchise for the sauna solarium and Carole returns from her assertion course.

• _{Monday, January 13th, 1997}

  2: Reviewing The Situation

  Brittas initiates a staff review which causes some antagonism; Julie is enjoying armed police protection after threats, which includes body searches.

• _{Monday, January 20th, 1997}

  3: http://etc.

  The center enters the 21st century as Brittas has everything computerized, which causes huge problems. Councillor Druggett is convinced it is a waste of money and will be Brittas' downfall. Helen's therapy course seem only to appeal to staff.

• _{Monday, January 27th, 1997}

  4: Wake Up The Lion Within

  Brittas returns from a course which teaches executives how to release inner powers by roaring like a lion. He encourages his staff to try it out. The Leisure Center has been nominated for the 'European Award for Excellence'.

• _{Monday, February 3rd, 1997}

  5: The Disappearing Act

  The staff at the leisure center compete for the Employee of the Month award though Brittas is not convinced of the wisdom of the competition. Colin brushes up his magic act for Julie's niece's birthday party. Helen holds a dream workshop.

• _{Monday, February 10th, 1997}

  6: Gavin Featherly RIP

  Gavin is feeling depressed and is receiving therapy from Helen Brittas. He joins the rest of the staff on their annual weekend break to Burbidge-on-Sea and goes missing so Brittas arranges a funeral.

• _{Monday, February 17th, 1997}

  7: Exposed

  Investigative journalist, Roger Ferguson, is preparing to make a television expose of the goings on at Whitbury Leisure Center. Gordon is led to believe this will be a serious documentary. An outbreak of Bobula fever causes panic.

• _{Monday, February 24th, 1997}

  8: Curse of the Tiger Women

  Brittas prepares to celebrate seven wonderful years since the center opened, but Druggett tells him he has been chosen for early retirement. Carole reveals he's the father of her twins!